We keep saying we know God is going to work in us and through this.  "This" being a cancer diagnosis. God is already at work and we can see His hand during what should be a ridiculously scary experience.  I don't know why but I'm still hesitant to bare my soul about everything.  (I'm not as strong as my husband is). But for those who want to keep in the know, Joe's blog is here.  He named it Walking Through the Fire because from the beginning Isaiah 43:1-5 has been a bible passage we've stood on. The first few verses are below:

It goes on to say that we are precious and honored and God loves us and to not be afraid because he is with us.

Joe thought a blog would be helpful to keep friends and family up to date on what is happening.  He also wanted to chronicle this journey so we could look back and see how God wove everything together for his glory and our good. It scares me to type that because there is a very real threat to our family here and it's one I have to constantly bring under subjection.  I can't succumb to the fear.  I made up my mind to trust God every step of the way. Trust him when the biopsy goes wrong (Trust him that Joe needs a biopsy in the first place).  Trust him during a 3:30 am trip to the ER after the biopsy. Trust him when the diagnosis is in fact "cancer."  TRUST him.  I'm believing for complete healing for my husband.  But I'm not trusting in that.  I'm trusting in the Lord.  Whatever happens.  Whatever comes.  I trust God.

The Sunday after everything happened the song "Oceans" by Hillsong came on during the worship service at my church and it was as if my feet had a mind of their own.  I nearly ran to the altar, fell to my knees, and praised God. I praised Him because He is GOOD. I praised Him for carrying our family through this journey. I praised Him because it was all I could do.  The bridge to the song goes like this:

And my faith will be made stronger

In the presence of my Savior

Read more: Hillsong United - Oceans (Where Feet May Fail) Lyrics | MetroLyrics 

I couldn't have said it better myself.  I want TRUST without borders.  He's taking me deeper than my feet could ever wander.  I want my faith to be made stronger. And I want to remain in his presence.  A friend said to me, Victims say "Why me?" Victor's say "What now?"  And I would add "Lord."  



I'm copying Joe's blog- I love that he ends each post with a song.  Here's the entire song "Oceans":